Friday, October 14, 2016

Lincoln turned 1 yesterday!

Lincoln turned 1 yesterday!
Watching him grow
over the past year has been amazing.
The changes that occurred in that time
are nothing short of miraculous.
He is now a toddler that has
learned and grown into who he is today.
It was a year of tiny steps, literally
and figuratively.

Every step counts!
If we never fell and got back up
we would never learn to walk.

Take the first step,
what would you do if you knew
you would not fail?

Peace & love
for every step of the way

*Lin is just about ready to
take those first steps!
He is still a little scared to let go
however when he does,
watch out world (and Cameron) ;)

I will keep you posted

Wednesday, October 12, 2016


Sometimes it is......


Breathe in & breathe out

Peace be with you,

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Happy Birthday Ben

Today is Ben's birthday
Although we may not see him sitting at the table
to blow out his candles.
We will celebrate his life, with his children
Cameron & Lincoln and he will be present.

Everyone who loves Ben continues to see
signs of his love all around us and his spirit
lives on in the beautiful boys he created with Hillary.

We have a light in our dining room that
burns brightly all day and night
every day and night and has not gone out
since Ben left our home the day of his passing.
There is a plaque with the caption

"There are some who bring a light so great
into the world
that even after they have gone
the light remains"

Ben is and always will be a light that burns
brightly in our hearts and in our home.
We will continue to honor his life and light
by sharing the love he shared with all of us.

Please join me in celebrating Ben's life and
the lives of all those that have left a light
burning on our hearts.

May we all find peace in knowing
the light remains!

In love, Kristyn

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Hope, (my favorite feeling)

I love signs!
When I came across this one
I knew it would be one of my favorites

It is also the new home
for the beautiful angel I
received as a gift

                                           Have faith
                                           Open your mind
                                           Peace will come


Saturday, October 1, 2016

The straw that broke the camels back (my apology to my family)

This one is another "keeping it real" post.

Today I lost it, I lost everything.
I lost my will to go on,
I lost my patience,
I lost my kindness,
altogether, I lost my mind!

For me, it was simply banging my knee that had
the ability to push me over the edge into a pit
that held nothing but despair, anger, frustration, and sadness.

It really was not about banging my knee.
It was the final straw that ultimately
"broke the camels back"

Not sure if any of you remember this game
the idea is you pile straws on the camels back
until eventually the camel simply can't withstand the weight
and it's back breaks.

If you are reading this blog on a regular basis,
I believe there is a pretty good chance
that having someone you love who suffers
with addiction is probably only one of the straws that
you try ever so hard to keep on your back.
Some days are simply too hard to face.
Most of us try to keep the peace and be strong.

Today I was not.
I made poor choices in how I handled
"the last straw"

I lost my shit
and had a fit of rage
and simply gave up.

It does not end there,
I may have lost the battle,
however I have not lost the war.

I retreated to my room,
I cried,
I screamed,
I prayed,
I felt sorry for myself,
and I slept.
It is amazing how good old fashioned sleep
can change things.

I am not okay,
although I am ready to face another day.

I will shift the load on my back
I will ask for forgiveness,
and I will start another day
knowing that I love
with my whole heart and
I do my very best to offer kindness
to my family and beyond
each and every day

For caregivers
You are not alone,
we are a team.
I hold you in my heart
for today and for always.

For those that suffer with addiction
cut your caregivers some slack
they love you and
would give up everything for you

For those that don't have caregivers
you are in my heart and soul
and you are loved by me,
It may not be a lot
but it's something important.

may peace be with you, and with me!

Change needs Change

Newton's First Law of Motion states that an object in motion tends to stay in motion unless an external force acts upon it. Similarly, if the object is at rest, it will remain at rest unless an unbalanced force acts upon it. Newton's First Law of Motion is also known as the Law of Inertia.

Ask yourself these questions.
Who, what, when, where, why and how
did you get where you are.

Has any of these things changed
to get you where you want to be?

The decision is yours, if there is
no force that modifies the path,
the path WILL stay exactly the same.

This idea is true for both the people
who suffer with addiction and its effects;
and the people who absolutely adore them
more than anything else in the world.

We must be
the change
we wish to see
in the world 
-Mahatma Gandhi

Change can be scary
change can be hard
change can be well worth
the fear and the effort

My love and support for all who face change
for better or for worse in unending.
There is NO FORCE that
will change that

with prayers for peace