Sunday, April 24, 2016

Part two: fixing what you have broken

Part two: fixing what you have broken

In my lifetime I have made tons of mistakes and broken many things. Some were small and there was very little consequence, some were pretty big and changed the course of my life. What I have learned is that the things I have said or done that hurt me or others had to first and foremost be acknowledged. Living in denial of my mistakes allowed them to build up in my heart and was a heavy load to bear. Once I recognize what I have done, I try to figure out why and what I can do to fix it. I am pretty hard on myself and like to fix things so I do everything in my power to make it better for myself and those I may have hurt. I have a really hard time letting go of most things; my family will tell you I will hold onto something until I see it has been solved which is a blessing and a curse all at the same time.

MY 10 steps to repairing things I break

1. Accept I am not perfect and recognize my mistake
2. Try to figure why I screwed up
3. Ask myself who I may have hurt in the process
4. IMPORTANT: forgive myself
5. Tell those I have hurt that I am sorry
6. Ask for their forgiveness
7. This is the hard part; wait until they are ready to forgive
8.  Thank them for their forgiveness
9. Try really hard to not make the same mistake again
10. Another hard one: let it go

This photo was taken by my husband Pete
He asked me to share the beauty and serenity
of the Cliff Walk in Newport RI

What is hard for me and probably most to understand is that even when every step is taken to repair something broken and forgiveness is received the memory of the event is still there. In a previous post I shared breaking dishes as a therapy I created for myself; lets say I decided to glue one of those dishes back together. It may be a useful dish again, it may be able to do exactly what it did before. No matter how useful and how well I repaired it, I must be more careful with it. I must hold it more gently because the glue that holds it together is not quite as strong as what the dish was before it was broken. If I drop the dish and break it again, it will be that much harder to fix. Each time it breaks from then on, it will take more and more effort on my part to fix it and it will become more and more fragile. Things that have broken need extra TLC.

Forgiveness prayer

Divine Power of the Universe
Thank you for the people, places and things
you have placed in my life.
I am sincerely sorry for taking them for granted
and for not being careful with your gifts.
Please forgive me
and send me the courage and foresight
not to make the same mistakes again.
Please send your healing power
to those I have hurt
to find it in their hearts
to forgive me
and give me another chance
to remind them of the love and kindness
I have to offer.

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